God’s truth cuts through all of society’s confusion about masculinity and manhood. In His eyes, true masculinity is the evidence you see in the words and deeds of a man, the embracing of his God-given role and his destiny as a man. In doing so, he is taking on the character and divine nature of God the Father and Jesus Christ.
A masculine man sets his mind to attain the strong qualities of sound character, rock-solid confidence, and strength. He is an unselfish, stable, dominant (though not domineering), decisive leader. Yet he is balanced and tempered by the complementary traits of humility, attentiveness, gentleness, and refinement. In short, he strives to live as Jesus Christ did.
How can you recognize a truly masculine man?
A positive, upbeat outlook is the first thing you notice. True masculinity starts in the mind. The masculine man has a “can do” attitude and is eager to accept challenges and responsibility. He is a man of balance. He is not egotistical or arrogant, but rather has proper humility, recognizing his own limitations and his deep need for God (Isaiah 64:6; John 15:5). However, he doesn’t put himself down or worry about what others think of him. He allows God to use and develop his talents and abilities for their best use. He doesn’t covet others’ belongings, nor judge his own worth by comparing himself against others (2 Corinthians 10:12).
His life clearly centers on God. He shows the mindset and demeanor of a man who is in effective daily contact with God through prayer and Bible study. Though content with his station in life (Philippians 4:11), he has real drive and ambition, not because he craves personal aggrandizement, but because he wants to help and serve others, to fulfill his God-given potential, and to bring God all the glory. He radiates proper confidence, even boldness, knowing he “can do all things through Christ” (verse 13; Proverbs 28:1). This understanding, tempered by experience, drives out unmanly feelings of inferiority and fear.
The masculine man is a man of conviction. He uses common sense and good judgment. He aims to make his decisions based on truth and rightness rather than on others’ opinions, or on taking the easy road. He strives to practice what he preaches, to eliminate hypocrisy and to embody sincerity. He doesn’t compromise his principles. He accepts correction gracefully and is not destroyed by criticism. He doesn’t snap under stress and pressure. Putting his trust in God, he is able to navigate the storms of life with inner strength, stability, and peace. He faces challenges head on, and alert to opportunities.
The masculine man is master of his body. He maintains vigor, vitality, and good health. He tempers his appetites, gets proper exercise, and is careful to get good rest. He has the self-control to abstain from drunkenness, premarital sex, illicit drug use, and other vices that may tempt him.
He is also unafraid to show emotion (John 11:35). He feels and expresses both joy and pain, yet controls his temper. He is an understanding man, skilled in the art of tact and diplomacy. He is attentive to women and children.
The truly masculine man draws other people to him. People sense that he is different, and recognize a winning attitude of right leadership. He demonstrates self-respect, as well as respect for others. He appreciates the role of women. At the same time, he takes charge when necessary, properly using authority in a Godly manner. He is a blessing to his wife and children, providing security, attentive engagement, successful leadership, firm guidance, emotional stability, and real love. He inspires esteem from other men and respect from women, providing an example they can look to. His masculine authority, balanced with sensitivity, makes him attractive. When a woman recognizes that a man has her best interests at heart and will consider her needs in his decision-making, she will gladly follow him. She appreciates and is inspired by his positive confidence along with his concern for her and for others.
Such a man is truly a benefit and a blessing to those around him. This is the kind of masculinity the world needs more of.
The truly exciting thing about such masculinity is its spiritual dimension. Study the jobs that God has spelled out for men: protector of women and children; provider for families; husband; father; leader; head. Consider the responsibilities and qualities God commissions in men: supporting those who are weaker; using strength for others’ benefit; supplying a family’s needs and wants; sacrificing for the good of the family and others; loving a woman through firm, compassionate leadership; expanding the family with children and then bringing them up; educating them, leading them in the way they should go, helping them grow in character; building society. All of these point in inspiring ways to Jesus Christ and God the Father! They have spectacular spiritual parallels. As you study them and fulfill them, you build a spiritual mindset that brings you in closer harmony with God. Manliness is next to godliness (just as, for a woman, femininity is next to godliness).
The more you fulfill your purpose as a man, the more masculine you become. That is Godly masculinity.